We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Randomize
