Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
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