she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
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