He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize