Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
Randomize
