i need an iv and a liver transplant
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Randomize