For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
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