I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
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