Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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