did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
My legs feel like baby dolphins
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
Randomize
