You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize