This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
