Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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