honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
You need Xanax blowdarts
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Holy shit dude........stairs
Randomize
