I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
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