you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize