lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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