Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
I wish there were birth control emojis
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
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