Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
