just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
Randomize
