I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
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