I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
