just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
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