I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Randomize