Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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