Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
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