i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize