You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
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