the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
We have so much sex to catch up on
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
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