Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
