He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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