You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
Randomize
