If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
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