Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
