ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize
