Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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