Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Randomize
