Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize
