Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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