It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
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