bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
