he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
