do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
