Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
