Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Randomize