sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
