Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
