Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Randomize