one might say we're banned from that church
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
