Non-Jews are for practice
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Randomize
