why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
It's blow job season.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Randomize
